Don’t worry, be happy…

At some point in our lives we have all experienced anxiety. It could be that sinking feeling, a churning stomach, an absence or squeaking of words when we speak. The squeaking is not fun, especially when speaking in front of an audience. It manifests differently for everyone, yet a case of ifs, buts and maybes can rule our lives – if we allow it.


When we get anxious and worry, we can get dumbstruck, you know, those vacant moments you have when you get really stressed? We forget the relevant facts, names and faces when we most need to. It happens to the best of us. There are many reasons why we forget, at worst we begin to lose sight of life’s purpose and become less present. At the time, it may not always make sense, yet eventually it does. When we live each day to the best of our ability, doing what we can, giving what we can… We reach that place of peace and acceptance. The remainder of what is to be, is up to the Universe – trust. Allow there to be a little mystery and magic in your life.

When we allow worry in, it creates separation and confusion. It worms into our mind, we alienate ourselves from wholeness within and the Oneness of life. Anxiety and worry about what we might be, limits what is and can be. Guess what happens when we focus on what we don’t want? We get what we don’t want…


The Universe, which exists on many levels, always brings people, those things and situations that we focus on; into our lives. Whether we want them or not. After all, it must be important, your energy, attention and intention is spending time focussing on the issue… Just let go, release your limitations and the False Event Appearing Real.

Allow there to be a space in your life. Surrender, allow and accept where you are, what and who needs to be in your life. Be present in your life by being you. Trust and know all is as is.

Ultimately, we all shape our lives; no one else. Our lives unfold through our thoughts, emotions, intentions and actions. Naturally, genetic ancestral memories, parenting, education, the media, our traditions, customs and religion can influence who we are and how we live. I hear some of you saying, “I didn’t choose this situation, it happened to me.” Or, “I was born into it.” Maybe your choices and path in life is different to your family and friends?


Yet it is all malleable, no single person’s life is completely set in stone. We all have free will, we can choose to change how we feel, think and be. Regardless of how we arrived in the present moment, whether the past has been difficult and painful, or effortless and amazing; the next few moments are unformed and unwritten.

So, is there any point in repeatedly bringing the unwanted situations into your life? (Unless of course you are a masochist who likes punishing themselves.)

For some of us, we are told that is all we deserve. Or, we have no worth. I’ll let you into a little secret, I used to be one of these people. Yet I learned from many around me, the person pushing worthlessness generally believes that about themselves on a deeper level. It’s their projected issue and to make themselves feel better they have to pass the pain onto others. However, we can get stuck in the roles of aggressor and victim.

Man's hands on prison bars

Sometimes it is easier to keep pleasing others, making them happy to hopefully minimise any bullying. It becomes a perpetual cycle of giving to please and placate. We see this pattern of behaviour in abusive relationships. Yet when we keep others sweet, that empty feeling and the anxiety of what might happen if we don’t remains. Commonly, we forget to self-care and nurture ourselves. Should we judge the bullies? Or change how we respond to them?

It can become a lifetime of stagnation, getting stuck in servitude to the tyrannical demands of others. Many people have been taught to make sure everyone else is cared for and attended to first. It’s a fine line between humility and hubris. And then there is fearful conditioning as a means of survival. Buying people gifts, cooking family and friends their favourite meal, keeping the home or office immaculate in case the boss, partner or parents shout, hit or reject us.

Is it any wonder we can become obsessed with making others happy? Guilt is a powerful, motivating force in many people’s lives. It is handed down from parents, teachers and religions. However, it is an illusion, entirely manufactured as a means of controlling how you behave. “If you don’t do as you are told, that makes you a bad person…” We’ve all had this said to us or been made to feel this way. It is complete and utter nonsense!


Conquerors, religions and governments have used the motivation of punishment and compliance for millennia. Though it is time to cast off the chains of illusion. We are far smarter than to buy into sin anymore. You know when you have missed the mark or caused harm to another.

Take responsibility, apologise, make amends and move on. We all know what is right behaviour – it instinctively feels right. The reality is, if others want to be controlling, manipulative and abusive that is their choice and nothing to do with you. How you respond to them and what you give permission to; is your choice. The only person you can ever make happy is yourself.

The truth is, you are priceless, unique and wise; one in billions upon billions. Each and everyone one of you as important as each other. It is your birthright to be you – to shine.


Embrace the abundance, joy and grace in your life, no matter how much is there; be grateful for who you are and what is in your life. Picture your needs, wants and joys already being a part of your life. Though be mindful of what you wish for. Trust and know you are meant to live a great and enjoyable life. When our needs are met, we can truly focus on growing and being human. As a sentient species, we have yet to discover our true purpose.

Though don’t just take my word for it. Stop for a few minutes.

  • Step away from the stress, worry and anxiety… release the illusion of limitation, take a few deep breaths and relax. Close your eyes if you want to.
  • Step into yourself. All you have to do is breathe and know it is perfectly okay to be you.
  • See, hear and feel the possibilities and allow there to be a space in your life for the new.
  • Be present within yourself, just be you for a few moments.
  • Relax, trust and know all is as needs to be in your life right Now!

Working with Energy medicine and EFT is an effective method for managing your stress, resolving your issues and enhancing the life you already have. The great news is I can share this versatile tool either over the phone or face to face. For further information,, and to book your EFT session, contact John on 07751-485204.

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